After spending a few days with my sister in the hospital with her newborn baby this week, I’m reminded of how as moms we really need to put ourselves first–before our children–in order to function. In her case, keeping up with eating, drinking and sleeping is what will allow her to care for a newborn and preserving that is most important right now. Once your children are older, caring for yourself should still be the first priority. Without your health–mental and physical–you cannot parent, work, and run your household effectively.

Rather than spend money on a vacation, consider these frugal ways to destress for less. Make them habits, and you’ll see great returns:

Unplug Regularly

We’re now used to the constant barrage of digital media–phones, computer, TV, video games–that it’s hard to imagine life without it. Give it a try! Make an effort to unplug the family regularly–either each evening after dinner or one weekend day. The benefits vary from more time to get projects done (always welcome!), more bonding between the family, and increased communication all around. I find that unplugging makes us use all the things we have in our house like toys, games, and other sources of entertainment that we’ve spent money on but are often ignored for electronics.

Get Outdoors

When the weather allows, getting outdoors for a walk is an easy way to destress for less. Take your camera outside one day and challenge yourself to take 5 interesting photos. This has helped me on the especially gloomy, cloudy days to get out of the house and raise my spirits a bit. We also enjoy taking the whole family for a walk through the woods to look for animal footprints throw rocks in the creek.

Do Less

One of the biggest changes I made to my life in 2012 was to start doing less. I put empty blocks on my schedule on purpose; as an over-committed, overly stressed person, something had to change. Doing less means I have time to do things like relax, read, go for a walk, connect with family or friends on the phone, and other priorities. If you make a list each day, make your list shorter. Recognize that downtime is important and worthwhile, and make sure you get it. You give your kids downtime, why not yourself? At first I was surprised that things did not fall down around me, but they didn’t. And I am much more pleasant to be around (just ask my husband).

Learn to Say No

It surprises some people when they hear me say “No,” as I’m often counted on as the one who’ll sign up, who’ll volunteer, or who’ll run the committee. But since I started saying “No” last year, it’s made a huge difference to my stress level. For 2013, I’ve already told myself that I will not participate in any consignment sales or yard sales for the first half of the year. My volunteer time is full, and saying no is the only way to preserve the Doing Less I mention above.

Connect with Real People

As easy as Facebook is, it’s not the same as actually talking  or meeting up with a friend. When you do, you connect with real people who know you, who support you when you’re worn out, and you’re often helping them as well. It’s hard to keep up friendships and family relationships once you all have kids and are pulled in many different directions, but the effort is worth it. You need each other. Whenever I talk to friends, it makes such a difference to hear that I’m not the only one going through ___ and I appreciate getting perspective on it. One of the ways I’ve combined habits is by scheduling a walk with a friend, then we get outdoors, get a little exercise, and catch up with each other all at the same time.

What are some ways you destress for less?

Original image from Pilottage on Flickr

This morning’s creation in the living room

I love hanging out with my kids this summer, but let’s face it–the house still needs to be cleaned. My kids do some of the chores; at ages 6, 6 and 8 there is plenty they can do. But I keep myself on a schedule of weekly household chores to make the whole shebang run smoothly. I use a checklist with these chores listed daily:

• one load of laundry (not always clothes–sometimes it’s dishtowels, sheets, swim stuff, etc.)
• make the bed
• quick clean the 1st floor (where we spend the most time)
• wipe down kitchen countertops & change out towels/rags
• clear out the sink
• quick clean bathroom surfaces
• review my To Do list for the next day

That’s just the daily stuff–what about floors, windows, and everything else? It can be overwhelming, and I used to feel like I spent the weekends cleaning while everyone else was “having fun.” At the beginning of 2012, I decided to get myself on a cleaning schedule. I’d been reading the blog I Dream of Clean, and Christine launched her ebook, Create Your Perfect Cleaning Schedule. It really worked for me! Instead of giving a specific plan, it’s a guide to help you figure out your own plan. The checklist with boxes was by far my favorite part. I really like the accountability of seeing what I accomplish every day. The template also has lines to list weekly and monthly tasks–like washing floors, decluttering closets, etc. I use it every week to list all my To Do’s so everything is in one place.

The other part of the ebook that I found most helpful was the yearly/monthly chart for chores that are easy to forget–vacuum the A/C vents, change the filter, get the gutters cleaned, etc. It’s helped me schedule those out on my calendar to be sure they get done regularly. If you’re feeling disorganized and want to try a schedule that works for you, I recommend Create Your Perfect Cleaning Schedule. It’s a gentle push that will help you tackle your weekly household chores in less time.

How do you tackle your weekly household chores?

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Happy Spring! It’s time to get back in the garden and get things into shape. But you’re on a budget, you say? Me, too! Here are some ways I get gardening supplies for free (or cheap):

Try Freecycle first
Every spring season, as the community is prepping their yards and gardens, the freebies come out! Many people will list leftover supplies such as pavers, tomato cages, etc. on Freecycle. I’ve gotten plants from gardeners thinning out their large hostas and daisy plants, and I’ve even seen bushes and trees offered. If you’re not familiar with it, Freecycle is an international non-profit organization that keeps items out of the landfills while building communities. You can find your local chapter at Freecycle.org. You can request gardening items you’re looking for, but please offer up some of your own items first.

Use what you have
Before you rush out to spend money, check your basement and shed for items you can reuse or re-purpose. You may have plastic containers, buckets, or recyclables available. I love how MrBrownThumb used toilet paper tubes for seedlings:

Find free mulch or compost
Many counties offer free compost at the local landfill or mulch where they are trimming trees; you need to bring your own containers and/or truck to haul it home yourself. Check your county’s website or with a local rec center for more information. You can also learn to make your own compost pile.

Share or trade with friends/neighbors
Instead of renting or purchasing an expensive machine on your own, go in with a neighbor or friend and split the cost. My next-door neighbor and I agreed to re-sod our front lawns at the same time, so we split the cost of renting a tiller, got a better deal on supplies by buying in larger quantity, and split the work. We also have complimentary tools–shovels, wheelbarrow, etc.–instead of duplicates, so between the two of us we have everything we need for our lawns and gardens.

Try Craigslist’s “Farm & Garden” section
I just noticed this (since I’m usually looking at furniture there), but there’s a “Farm & Garden” category on your local Craigslist. This looks like a way to get large machinery (like riding lawn mowers) at used prices, but I also see small-scale sales like trees and hedges for $3-4. I’ll keep an eye on mine and see what I can find for cheap!

Give DIY a try
Before buying, think about how you make your own for a lot less. You can find instructions for everything on the internet, and sometimes it’s worth your time and effort vs. the money. For example, you can make a rain barrel which will save you money on water, or you can make cute garden markers instead of buying them.

What other ways can you save on gardening?

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In between my spring cleaning and running around with the kids, I found a few minutes to decorate my entryway shelf for spring. It’s funny how that little pop of color can brighten your day. Mostly, I house-shopped, finding a Beanie Baby with an Easter Egg on him and our souvenir egg from the White House Hunt a few years ago. Online, I found this fabulous FREE Spring Subway Art printable from Simple Crafter. I just printed it on 8.5 x11 cardstock and slid it into the same frame I used in the fall. Storage tip–keep the other seasons’ printable in the frame, too; you won’t lose them and they’ll stay flat till you rotate the art.